Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Jim+Bo

Bo Derek is an idiot and I have proof.

I met Bo in 2000 when I worked on a photoshoot with her. I told me dad I got to see Bo Derek naked and he told me she was in Playboy and anyone could see her naked. I told him I had seen her naked in person in a hotel room while she changed clothes.
My dad asked me, "And?"
And she looked good. Her boobs are real. Slight dip, but nothing dramatic. Still perky.
"And?"
And she has some fine scars on her legs. Says she needs to wear hosiery to cover them up for photos. Claims they came from skateboarding as a child and horseback riding as an adult.
"And?"
And what?
"And... nothing? It didn't do anything at all for you?"
No dad. Seeing Bo Derek naked did absolutely nothing for me. If it had done something for me, they probably wouldn't have let me hang out in the room while she changed.
"Sheesh. What a waste!" and my dad walked away shaking his head.

Ms Derek also would not wear any pointed shoes. Since that was the fashion of the day we were hard pressed to find any round toed shoes. We found about three pairs in the entire city. "These are all ugly" said Bo. Yes, we thought that as well. WE also got 10 pairs of stunning pointed toe shoes. "I won't wear pointed shoes. I don't like the way they look." We pointed out that the shoes probably won't even be in the shot so that wouldn't really be an issue. "I won't wear pointed shoes. And I won't were those round toed shoes because they're ugly." And with that Bo sat down and turned away from us. So we took the Dolce & Gabanna round toe shoes (which for round toe, were quite stunning) back to the store and we scoured the city for other round toe shoes finally finding some non-descript non-designer shoes on sale and those she was just delighted with.
Gratuitous Tarzan photo.

So far, she's just an overindulged pampered star. Standard stuff. Then a few months later I read the article the photoshoot was to accompany.

From the September 2000 issue of George Magazine:
"Meet Bo Derek these days and you don't think about her firm torso; you think about her firm convictions. After the death of her beloved husband, director John Derek, two years ago, Bo, now 43, went into hiding. But this past spring, she . . . emerged a little blonder, a little thinner, and unabashedly Republican. Yet her family — and Hollywood — have given Derek less than a perfect '10' for her politics. 'My grandmother hung up on me when I told her I was a Republican,' she says.

"Derek switched political parties 12 years ago, after deciding the Democrats' 'social programs had gone too far and eliminated any incentive for poor people to be independent.' She jumped aboard the Dole/Kemp bus for the last 96 hours of their 1996 campaign, and there's been no turning back. . . .

"Friends have warned Derek to 'keep her politics to herself,' because her opinions could cost her work in very liberal Hollywood, but she says it's not a problem. 'I don't want to be seen as the poster child for the Hollywood blacklist. I'm working, and I'm not the only conservative out here.' "

Christina Valhouli, writing on "Bo Knows Politics.
Remember Bo? Born Mary Catherine Collins, she met director John Derek who was 46 years old and still married to Linda Evans. Bo and John fled the from the US and stayed in Germany to avoid John being charged with statutory rape under U.S. law due to Bo only being 16. When they returned after she was 18 they were legally married (it was her first, duh) and his fourth. They remained married until he passed away.

Bo talks on and on in the article about how she doesn't completely agree with the Republican party about gays, abortion, or other so called "values" issues. But what really got her on board the Republican party was that whole "incentive for poor people to be independent" plank they offered. Yes, because Bo has been on and off welfare her whole life and she really knows what a struggle it can be. Why she's been struggling since she started modeling in her teens living with her parents and then continued that struggle while living with her rich husband. Struggle, struggle, struggle. And this is why she is a Republican.

And that is why she is an idiot.
Wow, is my hair ever HIGH!

7 comments:

dit said...

too funny. what a story. lol. She doesnt do anything for me either. That is why I have most likely seen more naked women than most of the straight guys I know. lol

I am taking it you are a stylist for photos/films? Bravo.

jason said...

As soon as I heard "Republican," I knew she was an idiot.
Sad.
Marrying a movie star at 16 is a sort of private welfare system isn't it?

But your hair was hot back then...you can tell she's jealous.

Sherri said...

Poor people probably just piss her off, what with them slaving away to make all those ugly shoes...

Rachel said...

She's probably never taken public transit in her entire privileged life.

"Just David!" said...

Seems to me she never matured beyond the spoiled immature 16 year old who was fu%%king an old geezer(even though I'm older than he was right now, but I'm not diddling a 16 year old so I'm not a geezer-HA!). Sounds like a real piece of work. I've met a few of those lately, Republican a-holes, that is. Clueless!!

Carolyn said...

I have to say that the idiocy of Bo Derek doesn't really surprise me. The only reason she is struggling now is because she's an aging talentless moron. Not much of a market for that...
She has an issue with the Democrats stance of "moral" issues like gay marriage, but no issue with pedophilia, apparently. The only redeeming quality that she has, as far as I can tell, is that she had the good sense to get her picture taken with you, Jim. You look fabulous!

Michael Guy said...

Fuck Bo.

But YOU! Now that's a face to leave home for!