Monday, October 26, 2009

Countdown to Costumes, "What a Drag!"

Our first Halloween out together. It was crazy.We bought white smocks from the university book store (thank you science department) tailored them in slightly, added silver buttons and... Voilá, Clinique Ladies from Hell!

It helped that at the time I worked for Nordstrom and my cosmetics manager loaded me up with the goods. We had out "Silent partner pins" on, "Moisture Surge, Ask Me How!", we had free samples, "Ooooo, that doesn't look good, here, try this moisturizer." and we wore basic black loafers (no heels), "Girl, I am on my feet behind that counter all day. I need comfortable shoes!"

We went to the Seattle Aquarium Party (a big gay fest) and there was a "costume parade" that I thought would be super fun to do. I convinced Lyle and my brother to go along with me and we were shocked, (SHOCKED!) to discover that the parade led you directly onto a stage where you were interviewed for the costume CONTEST. The microphone came towards us and they asked us what we were, "Clinique Women From Hell" I replied meekly (turns out, if you put a wig on my head I loose my personality). They asked a few more questions that I can't recall, but the audience turned on us and started to make restless noises, at which point Lyle grabbed the mic and started shouting that they were all ugly and needed makeovers. We left in hurry after that.

Two years later we returned to the scene of the crime with Robb in tow. Lyle refused to dress in anything girlie and this was our compromise:
Catholic school girls out on a field trip with their priest. Lyle was consistently molested and bothered by people in his priest outfit. He regretted not going as an ugly woman like the rest of us.


Tim in Italy said...

You're bringing back so many memories, Jimmy! Halloween is just catching on here, but there is some resistance - Catholic country, you know. So the rule is, if you have a jack-o-lantern on your doorstep, trick-or-treating is allowed. If not, stay away! Personally, I think it's all a plot to uncover us devil worshipers. I don't think they've even considered the gay aspect of it yet!

"Just David!" said...

My worst costume was going in pink taffeta hoods and robes as Mary Kay Kay Kay... went over in Atlanta like a lead balloon although we thought it was priceless! We were Cosmetic Supremecists and had signs like Down with Estee Lauder! It still makes me giggle a little!